Jean Bringol LPC

At a workshop given for women supervisors, there were women struggling trying to juggle spinning plates of career, marriage, children, friends, community, aging parents and many other responsibilities. Though I’m not a medical expert, I do read and research what the “experts” say about stress, our self-esteem and our striving for perfectionism.

Self-esteem isn’t something you can see in a mirror or touch, but it affects how you feel. You can’t hear self-esteem but its there every time you talk about yourself or brag how great you are. One of the biggest struggles women have is trying to achieve perfectionism in their skewed vision of self-esteem.  If not careful, our self-esteem can drive perfection which is a futile exercise that can’t be reached.

Much of our response to life’s mishaps and problems depends on our perception or expectation of how things should or ought to be.  Media plays a major role in forming our expectation of how we should be or what we should have in order to be happy and joyful. One event in life does not determine the end of our story. Our view of life determines how we live our lives, not life’s circumstances.  Change requires we take responsibility for our actions and our behavior in how we think and treat others. Healthy self-esteem comes from a balance of roles in life in not allowing one role to drive the other.

Consider the quality view of self-esteem in knowing that you’re okay and worthy of being accepted and respected.  Quality self-esteem is a ticket to making good choices about your mind and your body. Without it, you hold back from relationships, friends and challenging experiences.  An improved self-esteem leads to more accurate evaluation and acceptance of ourselves as well as others. I would encourage and challenge you to discover your uniqueness and begin to enjoy who you are today, right now.

As Christians we are called to be keepers of Christ’s light.  A city set upon a hill not hidden out of sight. To be a witness of the One who died to set us free, to show His loving kindness, a faithful servant be. So be a keeper of His light and you will find one thing is true, God will always light your way each day — your whole life though.

J. Morse

cutv-news-radio-spotlights Jean Bringol

Dr. Henry Wright gives insight to what I believe which is our “thoughts” determine our words and actions and how we live our lives.  The following is a snippet taken from an article written February 2014.

“Our Lifestyle Determines Our Life’s Fruit – The lifestyle we choose will determine the fruit in our life.  We must choose this day who we will serve. If we are entertaining Envy, Bitterness, Strife, and Fear, we cannot be surprised if we reap the destruction of those things in our life.  If we are sowing mercy, peace, patience and love wherever we go, then those blessings will be what we are going to reap.  We have the ability and responsibility to choose what we sow, and that determines what we reap.  Let’s choose life and choose to sow blessings into our lives and the lives of those around us instead of curses.”

How we deal with life difficulties determines our quality of life.  We can’t always control our circumstance, but we can control our response.

Have you every seen a bitter old woman?  She’s grumpy, complains about her life and has no joy.  Are you holding onto bitterness or un-forgiveness toward someone today? Did someone do something bad to hurt you that you need to forgive?  Un-forgiveness can make you physically sick.

When we develop a heart of gratitude we acknowledge the good things, the blessings of life, and give thanks. Gratitude has a powerful impact on our emotional wellbeing. In a landmark study, two groups of people were selected.  One group was asked to count their blessings, write them out, think about them on a regular basis…The others were asked to write down their disappointments and problems and think about them on a daily basis.  The group that focused on their blessings felt happier, had significantly fewer physical complaints, and slept better than those who focused on unhappy and disappointing things in their life.

Bene’ Brown, TED Talks, has found that there is a relationship between joy and gratitude, but with a surprising twist.  “It’s not joy that makes us grateful but gratitude that makes us joyful.”

Are you holding on to bitterness and un-forgiveness toward someone today? Did someone do something that hurt you that you need to forgive? Un-forgiveness is like drinking poison and hoping the other person dies.  It’s as toxic as drinking dirty water — it will make you sick.

Many people go through life angry over past wrongs done to them, harboring bitterness, reliving hurtful scenes over an over in their minds.  Others look for ways to settle scores and repay those who have scarred them physically or emotionally.  Such anger and bitterness are parasites that suck joy from life and rob us of peace and contentment.  If you are struggling with such emotions, think carefully what it is doing to your mind, body and spirit.  You will pay a heavy physical and emotional price for it in the long run.

One of the major culprits to a stressful existence is holding on to bitterness and un-forgiveness.  We can’t control our circumstances, but we can control our responses.  Are you aware that the only person you can change is yourself? I like to tell my clients who want to change their mate, family member, friend…or anybody. “You can’t change another person on this planet…unless they’re in diapers!”  Who are you trying to change?

Negative attitudes create more chronic stress than anything else. Brain chemicals like endorphins which are required for good or happy feelings are depleted. We start overproducing cortisol, a stress hormone….that’s what starts tearing down our immune system and when the weakest area of our body is affected.

Hypertension, cardiovascular disease, stomach and digestive disorders, chronic inflammatory disease as well as some cancers are indicative of chronic stress’s toll on our bodies. Research shows we need to experience three positive emotions or thoughts for every negative one. Some of us aren’t wired to automatically think positively, so we have to make a conscious effort and choice to change the way we think.

Paraphrasing Scott Peck’s words from his book, The Road Less Traveled, “Life is difficult!” It is a great truth because once we really see his truth we can overcome it.  Once we truly know that life is difficult — once we understand and accept or embrace it — then life is no longer difficult.” The truth is — “difficulty is just a part of life.”

So ask yourself, “Are you willing to make those small changes and recognize the power of choice?” It can make a difference in your Body, Mind, and Spirit.

Much of my work as a licensed professional counselor entails working to balance the mind, body and spirit by using various tools to assist people in moving past their hurts and pains. The tools used might include Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT), Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), along with other types of methods.

Just because “they say it” doesn’t mean it’s true. Someone gave you an identity from an early age that may not fit with who you really are — maybe you haven’t questioned the authenticity of those writings — but it can put your batteries in backwards. Changing our perspective helps us make constructive choices to get our batteries in the right position and moves us into a healthier balance. “Who’s writing on your Wall?” Changing our words can change the way we think.

Join me on Tuesday, July 14th, at the AFC Wellness Center, 715 Discovery Blvd, Cedar Park, Tx
Time: 6 PM – 7 PM